Writing With Hope

Take Your Own Advice

Posted on March 19, 2014 Updated on March 28, 2014

Ever asked for advice? Ever turn to more than one person and wind up more confused? If you are getting your car fixed, it’s necessary to go on Yelp and get a second opinion. If you are going out to eat, it’s great to ask friends and neighbors, or you can try Googling it. But, when it comes to your life you need to be careful who you ask.

It’s OK to turn to a friend, family member or professional; but ultimately you know your situation and yourself better than anyone else. Those who care about you might have good intentions, but when you start second guessing yourself you give away some of your power. Some people get off on being the one to tell you what they think you should do, and usually it isn’t their fault, especially if you’ve opened that door to invite their opinion. Take a contemplative step back before asking for advice on a career move, relationship issue or any type of life alteration.

Here is the reason why: You need time to get your bearings because it’s better to sit still and meditate on a decision before letting opinions cloud your judgment. This is especially true in relationships, as there is nothing that can be more damaging than inviting parents or relatives, for example, into matters of the heart. Relationships are hard enough to make work, and making decisions can be even more challenging. It’s much more difficult when loved ones suddenly start dictating what ought to happen in your life. Before making a decision out of haste take a walk by yourself, meditate or clear your head. Do whatever works best for you.

It’s best to lay out all of your options and then take your time to let it all marinate. Do not go off and immediately start blabbing away to your best buddy, family member, psychologist, neighbor, postman, or anyone for that matter simply because they seem willing to listen. As cliché as it sounds, you really do have all the answers you need already inside you, and no one can make decisions for you. They can try if you let them, but then you run the risk of doing something because your parents or loved ones instructed you to do so. You end up living with a decision you ultimately regret and this can potentially affect the entire course of your life. Do not pollute your judgment with a hundred different opinions. Trust yourself because you know best.