I’m NOT Superwoman & That’s Okay!

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As someone that has a project management certification from Villanova, I’m excellent with managing multiple projects at once, including juggling professional and personal projects, from short-form content to long-form passion projects, plus #momlife of a precocious six-year-old that’s an avid, advanced reader already wanting her own YouTube channel, and a teething six-month-old that desperately wants to walk before he can crawl, grabbing everything in sight and finally smacking me with the reality that I’m NOT Superwoman!

Ugh…(deep breath)…having a new baby has been hard.

To provide context, I’m not in my twenties or thirties. Fill in the blank, folks. I don’t wish to date myself here for some of you millennials, but let’s just say when millennial parents have their own kids, they may end up raving about the world-crazed K-Pop band – BTS. Oh…the boy band of the twenty-first century. Meanwhile, my first-grader’s favorite bands are Queen, Pink Floyd, and The Rolling Stones. However, she did love BTS’ Smooth Like Butter after we showed her the YouTube video.

Ahem…as someone who’s half-Korean, I have to admit that I really enjoyed their collaboration with Coldplay’s My Universe, and our daughter thought so, too.


My Favorite BTS Video – LOVE the Coldplay collaboration and the racial inclusivity subtext.

Our kid is considered “wise for her age,” as so many have told us, and it seems to transcend her music preference. Don’t blame me. My husband loves classic rock and is constantly playing it in his car, but it obviously echoes the fact that our kid has… “mature” parents. I dare not call us geriatric. Needless to say, I had my son much later in age, which is becoming more of the norm (I tell myself this to make me feel better…lol.) My son is my rainbow miracle baby. I love him to death and would give my life up for him, but he’s a handful.

I discussed my experience a little in my previous article: When Crap Happens, Writing Through Trauma. But, my son was born six weeks early. So, we had a bit of a rough start with him. He was in the NICU for two grueling weeks. Now, he’s teething and going through his animalistic stage where he’s grabbing, pulling hair, drooling, gnawing on everything, throwing things on the ground, getting food all over his face, and wanting so desperately to walk. Screw the crawling! He came early and wants to do everything ahead of schedule, too. It’s cute. We might have another little genius on our hands—who knows. But as lovely and endearing as it is, it’s also a lot to deal with when juggling a career.

Gawd…honestly, I don’t remember it being this hard with our daughter!

I admit I’m not Superwoman. I can’t do it all without a little help, and I think it’s okay as women to acknowledge when we need an extra set of hands. That’s why I decided to enroll my son in a Montessori school for babies. My husband and I fell in love with the family-run daycare that operates out of their home. This will give us some much needed relief. We both worked remotely for a while. He does go into the office now, and I’m also prepared to. But, it’s been an adjustment for us all and as I’m currently now open to new professional career opportunities, knowing that my son is in good hands is so important.

As women, sometimes we’re expected to give up everything. We think that being a good mom means not having a career. Being a good wife means sacrificing ourselves and our identity. In fact, sacrificing our dreams is the worst parenting mistake, according to experts. You become a role model to your children when you prioritize your wellbeing, love yourself, show kindness to yourself, practice self-care, make no excuses, and instead, set out to achieve goals. When you practice self-care, you have more energy in your mental reserves to give back to your children and loved ones. You show your kids work ethics and that it’s great to have personal goals along with ambitions.

More On Why I’m Not Superwoman: Check out my brand new TikTok account @szestavillo.writer. #Bloggers, #Moms, #Writers, #Artists – #Follow & I’ll #Followback!

@szestavillo.writer

As #women we juggle career, #motherhood & more. We’re badasses but not superhuman, which is why I’m putting my son in daycare. #womenempowerment

♬ original sound – S.Z.Estavillo.Writer

The Bottom Line

It’s alright to know our limits. Knowing our limits and managing our time is vital to success in our professional and personal lives. I put my son in daycare because it was the best decision for my family, career, personal writing goals, and overall capabilities in managing it all. It will also be an excellent opportunity for him to learn valuable socialization skills and other cognitive development. As I let go and embrace this decision, I remind myself and you should, too, that sometimes we need to weigh all of our options and determine how much our time is worth. It’s okay if we can’t do it all. In fact, taking the necessary steps to improve our situation is key to evolving into our very best.


11 thoughts on “I’m NOT Superwoman & That’s Okay!

    Writing to Freedom said:
    December 11, 2021 at 11:46 AM

    Good lessons to be learning and modeling for your kids. Kudos

    Liked by 2 people

    macabeliam said:
    December 12, 2021 at 12:56 PM

    You absolutely made the right decision! 100%! Proud of you!

    Liked by 1 person

    jennylynnangelo said:
    December 12, 2021 at 12:58 PM

    Great post and inspirational to all women out there. I agree with you that we’re expected to be super human and we’re simply not. It’s okay not to be. Yes, to daycare too. I put my children in it when they were little babies and they turned out just fine!

    Liked by 1 person

      S.Z. Estavillo responded:
      December 12, 2021 at 1:00 PM

      I always appreciate your kind words and support, Jenny! So glad to hear that there are other women that understand. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

    realryangray said:
    December 13, 2021 at 12:04 PM

    You’re doing a good job, Mom! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    AmethystAP said:
    December 16, 2021 at 2:53 AM

    The title of this post caught my eye. I feel like at work people expect me to be superwoman. I’ve been feeling so stressed and overwhelmed at work since I started a new position about 3 months ago. It makes me feel incompetent and I feel like leaving all the time. The workload is tedious and draining especially around month-end with reports to hand in. I keep getting tasks added on in crunch times.

    I’m also a blogger with a dream of being a full-time content creator soon. As you know, as a blogger, even part-time, it takes a lot of work and time. Amongst that it’s important to make time for self-care, nurture your relationships, take care of your home and get enough sleep.

    How do you manage it all, especially with the added responsibility you have as a mom?

    Liked by 1 person

      S.Z. Estavillo responded:
      December 16, 2021 at 10:27 AM

      Thank you so much for this thoughtful response. Sorry to hear about your lack of job satisfaction. As someone who is looking for new opportunities, it’s exciting to know that there are companies out there that would love your skill set and talent. And yes – blogging does take time. I do use a project management tool to keep me focused. 😅

      Like

        AmethystAP said:
        December 16, 2021 at 12:15 PM

        My pleasure.
        I am open to new opportunities as well. I think I would enjoy working from home in the creative field this time around. What are you hoping for, if you didn’t mind my asking?
        I think it’s good to be open to receiving opportunities because something great can come along.
        Cool, what system is that?
        I’m currently reworking my system to find a schedule that works. I mostly use Google Calendar and Google sheets to plan.

        Liked by 1 person

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