Dealing With Haters: Internet Trolls and Nasty Comments

Posted on February 20, 2015 Updated on March 4, 2015

I have been bombarded by comments as I have two blogs I write and manage, this one and tvshowjunky. I find myself mostly deleting rather than approving them. Either someone is trying to promote a work-from-home opportunity or they have nothing better to do than to troll and try to pick an Internet fight. So it was little surprise to receive a pretty rotten comment from f*cky*u@yahoo.com, originating from IP address 174.3.204.253, S0106602ad084a489.ed.shawcable.net, tracked to someone in the region of Alberta within the city of Edmonton, Canada to be specific. There was also this whois link attached: http://whois.arin.net/rest/ip/174.3.204.253.

The attack was in response to an article I posted that tends to generate the most views: From Tots to Adults: When Spoiled Brats Grow Up into Bigger Ones! Let’s just say that I was called a word rhyming with “blunt,” and my mother (who is Korean) was suddenly a Chinese piece of sh*t. Yes, we look alike, but c’mon!

The troll went on to accuse me (perhaps because I am an American?) that I am somehow “entitled” and ensured to bless me with a greeting that rhymes with “Duck Foo.” He or she then proceeded to angrily accuse the United States of being uncivilized because we are not a socialist society that provides a free college education. I don’t object to affordable college tuition, and President Obama is currently working on free community college, which would be fantastic. These things take time not to mention political aplomb, so it may not be implemented for many years if ever.

I take nothing back nor do I apologize for my opinion, which this person is equally entitled to have as well. But, I also have a right to monitor all comments and delete hate speech or nasty comments. Going back to my previous article, I do believe that especially in today’s generation there are more spoiled adults than ever before, people who are in their 20s and 30s yet still have their parents pay for everything. Even if they don’t live at home their parents pay for a down payment on homes (hundreds of thousands of dollars) that would otherwise take most of us more than a few years of savings to actually earn ourselves via a job. Others are just given wads of cash whenever they need it. And if mom and dad are wealthy enough, then the parents buy whatever home or condo their adult child requests. The spoiled adult child doesn’t even have to have a job or anything. And for those that do live at home still, I understand that minimum wage doesn’t make it easy to live on your own. I also understand that things happen, such as losing a job and being forced to move back home until you can get back on your feet. But, ultimately, society refers to these individuals as “kids,” as they are still relying on their parents for everything: buying them a car, food, rent, spending money.

I think parents today enable their kids in the worst ways. They don’t want to cut the umbilical cord, or perhaps they feel they can’t because they fear what will happen to their lazy or inept child if they do. Still, this behavior doesn’t prepare their children for a future of responsibility; it creates spoiled adults who expect everything to be given to them.

This arrogant Internet troll continued to accusingly ask if I “paid for my own food,” siding with spoiled kids, acting as if it’s evil to require kids to learn some responsibility. Now, mind you, when I speak of “kids” they’re more or less adults. I am not talking about child labor, for crying out loud. I am not talking about child abuse and starving your 8-year-old because he/she is not helping you buy groceries. I am not even talking about the 18-year-olds but the 20- and 30-somethings that are still mooching off their parents.

As a teenager, I did help pay for groceries, actually. When I lived at home before moving out, I paid my mom rent and for groceries at 16! It wasn’t much, but it was enough to teach me a sense of responsibility. I had a job and went to school. I enjoyed doing both and I still enjoy working my butt off and earning the things I have in my life. I also don’t advise 16-year-olds to get a job if it distracts them from their education and getting good grades. But I also believe that if a 16-year-old really wants to get a part-time job so that they have spending money then they should. As long as it doesn’t interfere with their grades, I see nothing wrong with part-time work for high schoolers.

So, for those 20-somethings (or older) that I am actually referring to that still live at home and aren’t suffering from a serious medical condition or disability, yeah, I believe that if they live at home they need to have a job, pay rent and their share of the groceries, take care of their own car insurance and gas money, at the very least, that is if they can’t pay for the entire car note. Paying for a portion of the utilities is also not too much to ask.

And speaking of education in America, many of us worked hard to get our diplomas. No, we don’t like student loans, no one does. And, yes, many of us wouldn’t object if every university were free. But the fact remains that some Americans have had to pay for their own college, and it makes those of us who did appreciate our education all the more. Especially those of us who had to do it completely on our own. I’ve worked really hard to obtain my bachelor’s and master’s degrees without help from family. I also have a project management certification. All of my education I earned through hard work. I received some scholarships, yet it still took a ton of effort in order for me to not drop out or give up. Some of my friends had their parents help them with their education, that’s also great. They worked just as hard and appreciated the help. So, on the contrary I am nowhere near entitled, and just because I live in the United States doesn’t automatically make me or any of my countrymen or women “entitled.”

Most of us Americans do believe we live in the best country on Earth, where we’re uniquely given the opportunity to rise to the top, to open our own business and to achieve our heart’s desire as long as we put the necessary sweat into it. But are we without flaws? No, we’re not without imperfections, and if you look at Canada or any other country you’ll find plenty of flaws no matter how “perfect” their way of governing their country seems to be in comparison. I’ve often heard this sort of criticism from some, not all, of the people who live in other countries that really have nothing at all good to say about the United States. But I am a proud American and when I write that I am “half Asian” it doesn’t automatically mean I’m Chinese. This sort of ignorance, hatred, stereotyping and flat-out bigotry is the root of so many hate crimes and what perpetuates intolerance.

The Bottom Line:

I do not apologize for writing from personal experience and therefore forming an educated, experience-based opinion rooted upon personal observations. I do not always agree with every blogger and what they write. But I’ll read them and try to form an objective comment. I don’t even mind when people disagree with what I write. I love a healthy debate; we’re all not meant to be clones of each other. What makes this country and the world beautiful are our differences. I’ve had some amazing comments that were highly thoughtful and introspective yet pointed out aspects of my article that they agreed and also disagreed with.

To Internet Trollers, haters and those that just don’t like me: Find a better use of your time than to leave hateful comments and call people horrible derogatory names, regardless if you’re just doing it for kicks. It’s not cool. Like other bloggers, I’ll delete your hateful comment. This is exactly why I ensure to approve comments prior to allowing them to post. I don’t write to be liked, however; I believe I am a fairly open-minded person. Where I must draw the line is when it comes to hatred, hate-speech, prejudices, bigotry, and extremely derogatory statements. I have absolutely no tolerance for ignorance.