We’re in the age of sharing…everything. Whether it’s checking in to Yelp to report what we’ve eaten for lunch to posting our sweaty workout pictures on Instagram just to show off our abs. After all, we worked hard on them, didn’t we?
Oversharing is more than what we post on our social media platforms. Have you ever been in a situation where you’re compelled to discuss your project or goals? Sometimes people feel that by sharing, we are holding ourselves accountable. But, I think there is strength in working hard in silence instead of boasting to anyone willing to listen. There isn’t anything wrong with taking pride in our work. There isn’t anything wrong with sharing our success stories or opening up about our daily lives with the world. Many influencers, content creators, and celebrities out there do just that. In fact, that’s how some creators make money by sharing their every waking second of success or failures with hungry fans.
Certain platforms, such as Twitter, even reward you for tweeting a certain number of tweets per month. If you get enough fans and share enough interesting tweets, then you can try and monetize your Twitter account. How? By providing content to Super Followers who will then pay a monthly $4.99 fee to follow you for bonus content, membership perks, and more. While I guess I recently met the criteria to monetize my account, I opted out. I don’t like the pressure of asking my followers to pay money monthly just to follow me. My main concern is that by doing this I can potentially lose followers. Anyway, the point is that every social platform functions and thrives off of people sharing everything about their lives. We’re living in the age of oversharing, where we all live in glass houses that the outside world can easily see.
There is no need for privacy when everyone is essentially rewarded for being bold, transparent, and willing to share, share, share. However, a sense of strength is lost when you expose your goals instead of keeping them under wraps until you actually complete them. It’s almost worse to tell everyone your goals and personal plans too soon. It’s like you end up jinxing yourself when everything falls through the cracks. In my opinion, it’s much better not to talk about what you’re going to do. It’s a heck of a lot stronger to simply be about it and like Nike always says—just do it!
When you find yourself wanting to brag, ask yourself why? Are you lacking in self-esteem that you feel bringing up goals, projects, accomplishments to others will make you feel better about yourself? Is it validation you’re looking for? Do you secretly crave for other people to give you permission or encouragement to start a project or complete a goal? Is it possible you can learn to validate yourself instead of looking to external sources for it?
The Bottom Line
You give away time and energy talking too much about what it is you want to do, what you’re going to accomplish or go on about your big dreams. There’s a time and place for sharing. But then there’s a time and place to simply shut down that need to overshare and let our actions do the talking. It’s like what every writer is told: show, don’t tell. Success is also about showing instead of telling. It’s easy to play up your status in life, as many do on social media. It’s easy to act “as if” until you get to where you want to be.
Even Beyonce is a big proponent of keeping her personal goals close to her vest, according to an “Insider” article. She never shares her personal goals with family or friends. The article makes a good point that many people wouldn’t want to broadcast every failure, so why the need to broadcast every success? It not only puts you in the habit of one-upping people in your life, but a boastful attitude becomes a turn-off very quickly. If you feel the need to tell someone or do a little bragging, try keeping a brag-journal where you can list your accomplishments for days you need to feel more confident. It’s much stronger walking the walk instead of talking up a big game only for most of what you say to be a façade.
Keeping quiet about your goals doesn’t mean you’re not getting them done. It simply means that you don’t have the desire to tell everyone about it. Keeping your goals on the DL (down low) also helps to keep us working hard and staying humble while doing it. Winning at life is more than the act of beating our opponents. It’s about knowing how to win with grace, dignity, and a little humility.