Self Help
It’s Not About You!
Having a peace that surpasses human understanding is a challenge in almost any situation. There are natural human emotions that course through our bodies in response to professional or personal experiences. But, if you are unable to find peace, then you must examine the feelings inside you and decide for yourself what lesson you will learn.
On a personal level, we all hope that we are able to elevate ourselves above negativity. Instead, we strive to bring into our lives everything that’s good, that we know that we are abundant in every department, which makes up our universe and we lack no resources. While some of us exist with that deep knowledge within us, the reality might be to the contrary. In our professional lives we might have all the skills necessary to prove our competency, but one cannot force respect from others. Respect is “earned,” as some might say, yet even if it’s earned we still live in a world full of stubborn people who sometimes aren’t willing to respect you. It stops becoming about whether or not you “earned” respect and it starts becoming about someone else’s ignorance.
Especially in professional circles, I have found that some people will refuse to show any sort of respect for education, skills and competency regardless of what you do or how much you prove. The greatest lesson I have learned in how and why people treat you the way they do is that their behavior very rarely has anything to do with you. A person’s arrogance, entitlement and egoism — and let’s not forget the natural chip on one’s shoulder — is a reflection of whatever unresolved baggage they still lug around. Read the rest of this entry »
Be Your Own Ally: The Value of Failing
Maybe you live in a world where everyone cheers you on, where everyone is on your side and no one wants to rain on your parade. If so, then I’d love to visit your universe because, in reality, where good exists so does the bad. And if you grew up being told all your life that everything you did was great, that you could do no wrong, then your first sign of rejection probably turned your world upside down.
While it’s fine to get a trophy just for participating, the blow of a loss, rejection, a letdown, and, yes, failure can be just as much of a prize. It might not sound logical at first but understanding how to take a hit is just as valuable, if not, more so than all the gooshy flattering words of affirmation one can spew on another.
Who doesn’t love positive words to affirm our value, self-worth, and give us meaning where we might otherwise feel void of purpose? Who doesn’t want to be reminded of our greatness, to be told we can do anything and everything? When in reality we might hate exercise, for example, so becoming an Olympic athlete might be out of the question. Read the rest of this entry »
Success Doesn’t Require A Leap, But A Micro-Step
According to recent 2014 statistics, here are the top 10 New Year’s resolutions: lose weight; get organized; save more money; enjoy life more; stay fit; learn something new; quit smoking; help others; fall in love; and spend more time with family.
However, out of the 45 percent of Americans who make New Year’s resolution, 24 percent fail and only 8 percent actually succeed.
Many people also have a bucket list of what they’d like to achieve before they leave this earth. Running a marathon happens to be one of the most popular. In 1976 there were approximately 25,000 marathon finishers, a small number compared to the record high of 541,000 determined runners that completed marathons in 2013. This is despite the Boston marathon bombing on April 15, 2013. Rather than deterring Americans, the tragedy perhaps inspired more runners to put on their running shoes. Read the rest of this entry »
Love is an Action, Not a Text Message
There is strong speculation that there are numerous ways love is demonstrated and expressed. There are also varying definitions for what love is based upon the individual, because love can often be very subjective.
According to the well-known self-help book The 5 Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman, love can be expressed through words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch. However, from my perspective all of these can be grouped into one simple category: action.
My experience in dealing with a dysfunctional, cold and emotionless family and the ups and downs of personal and romantic relationship tells me that everyone to some degree can relate to either giving too much love or not receiving enough. Don’t get me wrong, Dr. Chapman is correct that there are various ways you can express love, but the best way is through action.
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Setting Expectations in Your Professional & Personal Life
According to an article from Harvard Business Review, Four Mistakes Leaders Keep Making, a common behavioral trap to fall into is the failure to set proper expectations. While the article is geared toward working professionals in various fields, setting expectations is imperative in your personal life as well.
Lack of communication can cause the smallest conflict to erupt into World War III. While there is an art to every craft, there are different types of genius. Muhammad Ali couldn’t develop the theory of relativity because he wasn’t a physicist. Albert Einstein, meanwhile, wasn’t trained to win 56 out of 61 boxing bouts, 37 of those victories by way of knock out.
No matter how brilliant Ali was in the ring or Einstein was at science, neither completed a musical composition at the age of 5 like Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart did. Read the rest of this entry »
Writing With Hope 