Drained is the only word that describes my current state. And no, I’m not going to blame it on daylight savings. I am searching for momentum, but each day I’ve found myself struggling to find the energy. It’s taken all of me to be a present mother living in the moment with my daughter. So unfortunately, I’m not an everyday blogger. I used to be and then I created a very active little human that requires a lot of attention. My daughter is priority. Managing my time is not a matter of discipline, but a matter of energy.
I’ve been guilty lately of missing out on reading posts from my favorite bloggers I follow and not having the opportunity to discover new ones. Honestly, I do feel disappointed with myself for not putting more words on the page. But, maybe it’s not such a bad thing that I’m giving my daughter what she truly needs…my undivided attention. By the time I get to the evening after putting her to bed, I am wiped out. I catch my inner cheerleader trying to motivate me reminding that “she’s asleep, time to write!” But, by the end of the day I’m just drained.
Perhaps it’s my perfectionist ways that stop me from throwing up a post. While I realize I have to cut myself a break having an active 10 month-old, my ultimate goal moving forward is to get back on a better schedule.
The Bottom Line:
To the everyday blogger, devoted blog readers, and commenters that take the time to do so regularly. I commend you. My hope is that I can regain my momentum. In all honesty, some days it’s tough to put a sentence together. Knowing that I am giving my daughter what she needs, a mother that is truly present. I have no regrets.